So another year, one more birthday gone by. There's something special about this day isn't it? As kids, we look forward to this day, when we are dressed in pattu pavadai in the morning, the customary visit to the temple, payasam lunch, namaskaarams to elders and gifts in cash or kind. Then in the evening, the pavadai is replaced with a lacy frilly frock, in pink and white, friends come to a decorated house to wish you and celebrate your day with gifts. Cake is cut and served, and you feel special. As we grow up, the customary visits to temple become a rarity, as you need to be in college, or school or work. Instead of frilly dresses, we wear something more sober, there are no parties held at home, friends want you to treat them somewhere else. Then as years go by, when you have a husband and a kid, your own birthday excitement takes a back seat, you are busy planning your kid's birthday, or a surprise for your husband. Nobody plans it for you. Friends write on FB, the calls are less, messages are few, but you check your 'wall', it would be clogged with posts and wishes. I still prefer a phone call, nothing is more exciting than hearing your friend's voice, full of joy while he/ she is wishing you.sigh! The temple visits never happen, but you never forget to visit the temple for your lil one. The only outing is a trip to a restaurant for a dinner. But, the one thing that never changes is the 'payasam' made by Mum. No matter where her child is, the payasam is definitely made, given to everyone after the 'naivedyam'. Yes, birthdays are special, once in a year, you are the cynosure of your loved ones eyes, and no gift is as priceless as the feeling of being loved and wanted by the people you love. Thank you Ma!
About 10 years ago, on my way to work, I stopped at a chemist shop and bought a self pregnancy test kit. I reached the office, logged in, went about my routine, waiting for my team to settle down. A couple of hours later, I went to the washroom to take my test. My worst fear came true, the result was positive. I was pregnant. I just didn't know how to react. I cried. I was so scared. I didn't know what to do, whom to talk to, whom to call- Nothing! My mind was blank. I walked up to my Manager and told him, I needed to go home, as I wasn't 'feeling' well. My husband traveling helped, as I didn't want to answer any questions. I reached home and I cried my heart out, something I couldn't do in the office easily. After that, I threw up. Why did I cry? I cried because I was torn between keeping the baby and keeping my job. I did not understand at that time, what was more important. I knew in my heart that I could not leave a child with a maid and work peaceful...
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