Few days ago, one of my neighbor’s daughter passed away, she was hardly 40, she had given birth to premature baby, and No, the delivery was not the cause of her death, in fact she died 45 days after the delivery, due to fluctuating BP. Her death was sudden, as far as I remember she was a very sweet lady, I had interacted with her when she used to visit her mother here in my colony in Bangalore.
I went to pay my condolences to Aunty’s house, she held my hands, and cried, she was inconsolable, I fought my tears, I didn’t want her to cry more..
While walking back home, I thought, “Life!!! Is this it???”, it’s so damn unpredictable. The lady who died, must have had so many wishes, especially revolving her new born, and then I thought, I have so many wishes and desires – unfulfilled. What if I were to die suddenly? God, I would be one of those restless souls.
There are tasks undone, phone calls unanswered, messages which need reply, things in the house which need my attention.. My family – they need me, then I paused, and wondered, if they would really miss me, if I was to go away, with these thoughts when i got back home, I got busy serving dinner to my lil one, and while he was busy jabbering about his Ninja techniques and Chota Bheem adventures, I interrupted him and asked, “If mummy was to go away, would you miss mummy?” His immediate answer was, “Go where, mummy?, to the supermarket?”, I said no, “If mummy was to leave you and go away forever, would you miss mummy?”, he looked down for a while, and then looked at me with a forlorn look on his face and said, “I will miss you mummy”, thrilled by this answer, I asked him, “why?”, to which he said, “If you go away Mummy, who will make Dosas for me? and who will give me a bath, and do all my things?, so please don’t go away for long mummy”.. I really had a big laugh at the innocent answer and hugged my lil one, promising to pack dosas for lunch.
Whatever happens, however long I live, I know I will make an impact. There will be 3 people definitely crying their heart out, my son, my Dad and my sister…
Others will also cry, but people who would miss me every moment, will be these three, then maybe I will not be a very restless soul, I will Rest In Peace, thinking about them.
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